I had an appointment the other day
I went to see a neurologist
The end of my toe was feeling numb
And I wanted to get it fixed.
I was waiting at reception
The girl looked me up and down
She wrote something in her diary
And gave me a little frown.
She ushered me in and told me to sit
She said he won't be long
He's with another patient
So just remove your thongs.
When he came into the office
I gave a little start
He looked a lot like Tom Cruise
I felt the beating of my heart.
He said, come over here, remove your top
And sit upon the table
I looked down at my toe and thought
For this I might be able!
And then he got the feathers out
And ran them down my arms
Across my belly, up the sides
And then across my charms.
I said it is my toe you know
The bit that's feeling numb
He said I'm just checking all your bits
And now I'll do your bum!
Finally he reached my toe
He wiggled it a bit
He ran those feathers up my legs
And said there's nothing wrong with it.
Well by this time I was hot
And sweating from the brow
My body tingled everywhere
My toe felt great somehow.
And when I left the office
My breathing coming quick
My toe it felt all tingly
Thanks to my neurologist.
Well I made another appointment
I feel a little shame
Cos I'm going back next week
So he can fix my toe again.
Janette Tickner