A pest Imed me today,
He emailed me too,
He asked if I were single,
and asked, how do you do?
He asked all kinds of questions,
wanted all the details,
of my very private life,
demanded that I tell,
Age, sex and location,
he insisted that I share,
along with exact sizes,
of my bras and underwear,
I politely said no,
refused all his requests,
I told him very sternly,
Stop this, don't be a pest,
His Im kept on poppin up,
he asked if I were wed,
by then I was quite annoyed,
by all the things he'd said,
I asked him which part of NO,
he didn't understand,
I told him I was 85,
and wore 6 wedding bands,
but all my husbands now were gone,
and I had all their money,
you want to know about,
their accidents now, honey?
I told him I fart when I walk,
the hair's gone from my head,
I keep my teeth in a jar,
at night I wet the bed,
Sometimes I wander nekkid,
till somebody brings me home,
you wanna get together,
so I won't be all alone?
Suddenly the Im's stopped
so I wrote him an IM,
a little sign then popped up
that said he was offline,
I giggled and I guffawed,
I chuckled and I laughed,
I doubt it seriously,
if my stalker will come back
Elizabeth Lindberg