Pubic hair!
It's down there.
In your underwear
It gets everywhere
Oh!
I don't want to play with a Rubiks cube
I'd rather untangle matted pubes
It's better than playing with my boobs
Or shoving your nob inside a tube.
It's lots of fun and keeps me busy
playing with hair that's short and frizzy
It gets messed up if you have a grope
and always ends up in the soap.
Oh!
Pubic Hair
in the open air
if you dare
show your pubic hair!
If I had a loom I could be a weaver
Then I'd make cloth with my beaver
I'd start my own factory employing school leavers
making evening gowns and selling them to divas
like Mariah Carey, Celine Dion and Cher
Wouldn't they look nice
wearing pubic hair Oh!
Tony Blair
Isla St. Clair
Richard Ge-e-re
they've all go-o-ot
Pubic Hair!
So if you've been to hell and back
with a rusty bic, wax and Immac
agent orange and other weed killers
but still you're hairier than most gorillas
and all that you have got is maimed
coz your hair just won't be tamed
give up now
accept your fate
coz pubic hair is really great Oh!
Don't go spare
about your hair
coz everybody's got it
somewhere
Pubic Hair
Oh Yeh!
Helen Thomas