I need some help and advice. i cant stop thinking about a man i met a few months ago and who i have been sleeping with behind my boyfriends back.i am 20 and live with my boyfriend.I have become so bored and out of love in my relationship with him but am too afraid to move out and be on my own.i met this other guy through a friend and he is 25 and has been in a relationship for 8 years with a woman who is 33 years old, overweight and a bit boring (not to sound shallow) She does everything for him and he is pretty secure financially being with her and has a big house and a flashy car.I could never offer that kind of security with him but is it even worth being with him? i dont know. he's really sweet and we have lots in common but he also has a young daughter from another relationship and seems to be a bit of a flirt - hence me getting wooed in the first place. He is also very insecure about himself though which is why i think he stuck with her for so long.I want him so badly and dont know what to do.any advice? he has told me that i have a "profound effect on him",i dont know how to translate a man's words......please help me, i'll listen xx

Savio's Reply

Dear Sian,
Just give this shit up! You are basically having an affair and shifting all blame on the guy who himself is having an affair. Boredom is no excuse. Stop this affair and concentrate on one man at a time. Don't you believe in the saying "Boredom starts with boring people". I do!

Gavin's Reply

Dear Sian,
Both of you are eating the forbidden fruit. you enjoyed it till it lasted. Maybe you should continue enjoying till you get bored with each other. that seems to be your pattern. however the reality is that both of you are insecure. your insecurity will only rise if you continue in this relationship because there is a price one has to pay for eating the forbidden fruit.